Damned be thou, O spring

The summer days are gone.
The reasons i was born
are no more, a cold darkness
left, future is a dark abyss.

It's all the same now,
Not long before i take my final bow.
This is not the way it was meant to be.
This wasn't meant to be my reality.

Long ago i used to try,
many years ago i used to cry.
The coldness inside suffocates me,
like i am where i was not meant to be,

My character will die out
but the drama will play.
no matter how i shout now,
no matter what i say.

the third act all morose
hold it now, for i know not where it goes.
the fourth arrives in all its darkness
and misery, the sadness
suffocates me.

Days will come, days will pass by
I'll sit here all alone under the moonlight
and no matter how i try
I'll watch you go like a forsaken dream.

The spring shall arrive again
and I'll shall wait here
I know u wont remember
but i no longer care.

Mostly concerned with death

Lived a hundred dreams now is it sad if i die for one.


Never lived long enough to see my own death.


When i die Please dont cry.


When we die there will be no soul left, its just me and my ashes


Where do the bad folks go when they die?


If we become the same after our death then why not do sumthing bad and live our lifes to the full. At the end of the game both the king and pawn go into the same box, don't they?
you turn to ash me too.


Every man dies the same death every man lives a different life



Ashes to ashes dust to dust



Saw u yesterday,
did nothing just walked by,
nothing no more has any meaning
tommorow you too will die


Yesterday i was dead
tonight i shall die
i have this evening to live
why should i cry


the only reason i never walked far away from you was that i feared i wouldnt have the courage to come back

go away do not come back
for tommorow i may not be



i lived amongst men and tommorow i shall reside amongst angels.



i cry
when angels deserve to die



i cried twice
'cos they wouldnt kill me and then they wouldnt let me die



Given a choice between life and death i'll pick life so i could write about death



if i were to die, would you cry?


i say dont cry 'cos i can't live with guilt of being your weaknesss
i say dont cry 'cos i need  when i do.

Hopeless Romantic Fool

The wind blew hard along with its close friend, dust.It had been almost two hours waiting at the junction. Sunday afternoon ensure the absence of crowd on these roads.He re-read the letters with a vague hope that some hidden code or password lay somewhere but the words hadn't changed, they never did. No matter how many times he read the letter the stood intact, after all they were the sole guardians of the letters intent. If only they knew what difference they made to the poor boys life, the beauty they were capable of bringing to him, they might have relented.

He suddenly heard the noise of an upcoming vehicle. Stooping from his position he peered through the corner of the shop to view the vehicle on which rode his love. At that instant he realized,he had no idea of what he would speak to the angel. He felt dazed. Trying desperately to think of a line worthy of the beauty, the charm was an arduous task & the blazing afternoon sun was no help either. He staggered for a while.Then another thought crept into his mind, what if he became speechless as he had on previous occasions? The mere presence of such a probability gave him shivers in the sweltering heat. 'What would she be dressed like? A million possibilities roamed freely in his head, fighting for attention when their owner had none. The coach was fast approaching. This had to be her. To pass by at this time in this place. He thought he detected the sweet smell of her perfume blowing in the wind. All thoughts vanished from his mind and a picture reigned supreme.

The letter in which he proposed this meeting had been a difficult one to write. Written late at night, when the town slept and the wine house woke up, written under a tree in the backyard of his house with the moon for his only companion. It looked upon as the little boy undertook a perilous journey across the 40 pages he tore before he finalized a small and concise letter, not lacking the intent but devoid of profuse poetry. The coach had almost arrived He straightened his bow tie, brushed off dust from his coat, tried to undo the blemishes of the 2 hour vigil. The coach arrived in front of him. He stepped forward, was at a hands distance from the coach when he realized the coach hadn't stopped. He stepped back waiting for the coach driver to stop the vehicle. All he wanted at this moment was to be worthy of the love that waited inside this magnificent vehicle.Not wanting to rush into the matters, a trait he inherited from his father along with the coat, he waited. The coach kept moving. 'Stupid, coach driver couldn't he stop at this spot itself.' Now he would have to walk to the coach. But the coach did not falter in it's path & kept marching ahead. 'Of course, the coach driver must be taking her to the next junction.' He thought of running along with it but did not do so. Remembering a short-cut to the junction , he ran as fast as he could. Almost out of breath as he reached the new destination, he stooped with his hands on his thighs, his hair falling all over his face. A vehicle had just passed the road, it wasn't the coach he was sure. The road was dusty, the wind seemed to be a futile sweeper destined to clean the roads all it's life. The sun was setting, spreading the paleness of a summer dusk all around.A young boy sat near the road, waiting. Childish passions, alas, know no limits. That night the moon sighed, wished it could speak and not just be spectator to these spectacles, for few kilometres away a girl lay sick on her bed, begging to her parents to let her go out. Strange are the ways of life and the pawns don't decide the moves.

Few drinks, a crappy movie and a nightout later.....

The crescent has dimmed. The sky clear and subtle. No wind blows. There is silence all around except of course, for the chirping of the birds. A dog barks somewhere off. I light my night's (now the break of dawn's) last ciggarette. A million tree watch on silent and calm, the way do every morning. Party time wasting is so much fun. A tree stands alon in our courtyard. Home of a million birds, spectator of a milion dreams dreamt and many more forgotten , silent keeper of lost secrets. I hear the opening of a door. One of the genius student has already woken up for a new day, while I wait the end of yesterday. Have just finshed watching a movie. Don't ask me which and no slangs shall you hear.Cry me a river(Julie London version) plays in the background. The crow caw harsher today, they didnt expect an intruder into their realm I suppose. As I return from a walk around the corridor the crescent has disappeared, the sun is about to rise. The almighty sun is yet to defeat the miniscule moon. Yesterday love was such an easy game to play. Today is a different day. I wish to talk to someone, anyone, share a joke or two but its too early in the morning and no one's awake yet. Many an unknown men died yesterday, many a battle were lost. Many a briths to be heralded today, many a wars to be waged. A million will get bored today and few will live centuries this day, while a lonely boy will got sleep late wistfully waiting for time to stop and let him be what he was yesterday. Strange ain't it, that yesterday's could always have been lived better?

Back and Forth

I wasn't always like this,
my days lost i miss.
Let the memories come again,
let my eyes still rain.
The days fly by so fast,
i never realized my present would be my past.
I know you listen to none,
i know this cant be done.
I know you won't stop, alas,
I don't want this time to pass.
The rain drops wet me so,
pleading me to let my past go.
But how can i just let it be,
when i have never been me.

Yesterday i dreamt of my past,
and today i regret my yesterday.
Waiting for some miracle,
shall never unbound you of your shackles.
Stand up, stand up tall,
stand up what even if you fall.
For mistakes are due,
even if they are not few.
They tried to stop me at every step,
they tried to break my will.
I kept walking
and keep walking i will.

With Love, Me

Never forget......shed a tear when needed but cherish the memories. don't let the tears wash away your past.... the thoughts u shared, the dreams u saw, the lives u led, they'll stay. people may part but friends don't..... How i wish it was all the same...nothing changing... sadness is not the answer to the grief..... don't cry oh plz don't cry tonight...u know i am there waiting for u thinking about u.... i would have been with you but life is not all that we want..... i luv u no matter how far we are ....no matter how many years pass.....I'll always will be there right beside you....hope u trust me.... hope u still believe in the dreams we saw......the world that was ours..... the loves not lost ...it might be separated but the separation has given it a new meaning......dont cry tonight....it hurts to know i could have been better but then i hope u know i tried..........time passes on memory fades away but the feelings, the dreams dont let them pass....... remind urself of every dream u did dream as a child and live it..... remember what u disliked in those days....try not be like the ogre of ur childhood....not the fairy i now but the kind, nice, cheerful being u are.... time flies by and we cant clip its wings like an eagle it soars free over all the place never under anyones control everyone bows down to it...it flew over the deep black forest....the mighty oceans....the twinkling rivers........the huge part white part green part rocky mountains that stand guard of land unknown..... it bows down to none ....hope u don't either...... wish i could ask the eagle to halt but alas i am a mere being..... the world is not what it looked like to you but u can still dream, you can still see the good..... who knows there might be more good than u ever dreamt about...life is strange and beautiful..... memories are a strange thing they keep the pain alive but when the doors to good time open up, the world it helps us reach....the times passed by, we wish it could have waited........ make most of the moment.....moment passes by so do friends and so does life.....what is today may not be tomorrow.... and also remember tomorrow may not be yesterday it might be better......and remember i miss you and i miss you so bad.....but move on......cherish me but live life the way i would have wished for you......i hate tears ....i could never control them and the make this page so wet.....sorry for the blotches this watery stuff pouring like waterfall dont abide by any laws....... i ask u to not cry and cant even make myself stop from it....... u know i was never good at words......you were and how i miss ur lucid poems the fantasies the unbounded lands the quiet river...... u dreamt big and made me see it too..... i thank you for that and want you to know it'll never be the same...... everything will change but our friendship shall stand the test of time........ plz dont cry tonight for if u do i shall cry with you......

Omg A Happy 0n3!!!! :))

And I may not be the world's most passionate guy,
But when i saw in her eyes i was fuzzing around like Jeri Cola.....

Sometimes you feel alone, sometimes you want to be left alone, sometimes you wish you didn't feel so much, times change, moods change, wait and it all gets right. Life always has a happy ending. You'll make it alright, life goes on and so shall you.... The punishment sometimes does not seems to fit the crime but keep walking and in the end u shall shine....what a blooper of a line...me scx :)....G00d m00d are real g00d...wish we all had more of them....sumtimes everything seems to go right, the sun peeks out of the clouds, breeze messes ur hair and all u can do is smile helplessly, things come ur way...wish the day lasts long enuf to be written down in a notebook...days lasts long...night waits and with it comes the sigh...the sigh of remembrance of a new dream that was the day gone....Sweet Home Alabama rocks.....specially when u sit with ur friends and shout the chorus....

BTW re-read 1984...read Thousand Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez - 2 much hype, first 3/4 is good...last quarter starts stinks of repetition......read Hannibal Rising by Thomas Harris...not up to expectations but ten i expected 2 much....gud read once....

Confessions Of a Passer-By

There was a certain urgency in his manners. He didn't walk neither did he run, he moved in a manner I have never seen anyone move before, but then i hadn't seen a man who knew he would die 4 days later. Alas, modern science, the sweet poison. According to some formula, Poisson's probably, the modern oracles had calculated the moment of his death down to the last minute, a few days in advance. Obviously there was no cure, there's always no cure when you want one so desperately. It's easy to solve formula's, difficult to find a cure. So, from that day onwards he had acquired a manner so different, so strange that left me exasperated due to my inability to understand it.

To wish to see an eternity in 4 days is what fools strive for. Urgency and the looming shadow of death over him had made him a fool. A fool so sad had never been seen before. A fool so sad i didn't wish to see again. Life is strange, me with unknown days to live wasted it around foolishly. What assurance i had that i wouldn't die before him. Who knew i would live to see this day? Stupid medicine men don't know when to keep their mouth shut, they had to boast about the technological advances they had acquired recently from some other nation.

Alas, i have strayed a lot from my narrative too early. He stopped suddenly outside a building, waited. i watched him from the other side of the road, he wished to be left alone at that moment. Few minutes passed, suddenly he moved towards the entrance of the building. Stopped this ordinary looking girl and said something to her. He looked in her eyes, her hazel wet eyes stared at the floor. He kept on the monologue and for a moment she looked up at him, her eyes begging him to stop. And as if in a dream she ran inside the building leaving him standing all alone at the door. He had tears in his eyes too, but that was a common sight for me nowadays. He was not the hero of a bollywood movie he cried a lot, actually his eyes were forever moist ever since the medical debacle. Stupid girl hadn't realized not everyone had a lifetime to think matters over and live happily ever after. he loved her and had said so. She didn't and had run away. Life's mean , it likes playing games with you. He was losing and boy, he was losing fast. He was a goner ever since medi-kids had announced his departure after the sudden bout of sickness few days ago. I was his room mate and had traveled with him just in case he fell sick again. He had been quite ordinary actually,not a wiz-kid, not a rich man's son and certainly no hot shot in any manner. That's what i had always appreciated in him, he was no genius and he knew that, above all he didn't strive to be something he wasn't. Fear of the Reaper had changed him, he tried to do things he had only dreamt of before. This change had made him a stranger to me. He was not despondent, but it was his helplessness that killed me. One night he had woken me up and asked "What wrong did I do? Did i ever hurt u? Did i strive to take someone Else's position from him? A man waiting in the gallows for his death sentence at least has a reason to die for, what do i have? Lived a life so long without a reason to live and now I die with none." I was shocked,he hadn't spoken to me in this manner about this topic. I didn't talk about it to prevent reminding him, but had forgotten he couldn't get the truth out of his head.

All his life he had done what ever he wanted. He had done nothing of great value to the world. He loved a few girls but hadn't mentioned about his feelings to them. He was good in mathematics but then he didn't work hard on it. He had done what he liked, this sudden weakness crushed him. Killing him every moment.Yesterday, he died.

>>>>Shut da F*(< up<<<<

Nobody care's
Nobody acts as if they do
The light's forever gone
We stand in the dark
me and you
The feeling's pain
the feeling's my life's drain
i am no longer me
i'm one of the Society
i'm now WE
No words to pray
No songs to say
i stand alone in the Crowd
Lone & proud
Have to kill the i in me
to be one of Them
no one wants to know
about the sadness the shame